This is the hard part, right? It's only supposed to get better from here, or at least that's what everyone else tells me...The toddler years are difficult to say the least. You have the "Terrible Twos", "Tantrum Threes" & who can forget about the "Whiny Fours"? Throughout these trying years the there are a few things that we can do to find happiness...
1) Focus on the good. A lot of time we get so caught up in all the bad things that are going wrong that we can't help but focus on all those bad moments. When in all reality we need to be focusing on the good things that are happening. So what if your kids are driving you crazy, drawing on the walls, yelling at each other and following you around. Focus on the fact that you're teaching them responsibility when you help them clean up the crayon excursion. Or that they're learning to communicate better and express themselves to others, they're showing they care when they yell and "torture" each other. They only follow us around because they love us so much that they don't know what to do without us, they want to be like us or they may even want to help us in whatever we're doing. Focus on all the positives in your life, and you'll be so much happier.
2) Lower the amount of "extra" drama in your life. I know we can't limit the drama of a toddler but we can lower the amount of what I like to call "extra" drama. Where all the external people who are in our lives, family or non, are involved. If extended family can't learn to respect the boundaries that you have set for your specific family then you don't need them in your life. If your friends are causing more drama than necessary than maybe its time to avoid them for a little bit. These years are going to fly by and one day you're going to wake up and realize how you miss them climbing into bed with you in the morning, or when they have a bad dream at night. You may even miss them calling you into their room at night because they're bored and can't sleep and just want to talk to you for a little bit. If the people around you can't appreciate the stage of life you're at then maybe its time for everyone involved to move on and show love to each other in different ways.
3) Pray to be more understanding of your children and what they're going through. A lot of times we get so caught up in everything going wrong in OUR lives that we don't remember that our poor little people are facing emotions and circumstances that are bigger than them and they need our help. They need us to be the calm ones in their storm, they need for our love to be so much that it overflows them in waves of peace and joy. I pray every day, often through out the day as well, to be a better mom. My kids need the best from me, and that includes me to be more loving and understanding of their needs.
4) Treasure the "little moments." The other day was a rough one for us and at the end of the day, my little miss is exhausted and she walks over to me and says, " MAMA!!! I love you!" Which of course you need a little hug to go with that, and the world's biggest smile. Who could ask for more!? That same night my oldest was having a rough night and couldn't sleep, I could hear him playing in his room then I heard him yelling my name like something was wrong (he often gets nightmares and screams for one of us in his sleep) so I come running in and ask him what he needs to which he responds, "Uh, mama, can you read me [insert book here]?" So I ask him if he's bored and laughs at me and says yes. These are the moments that we're going to want to remember for the rest of our lives. the more they grow the more we'll find peace and happiness in these little moments that are so quick they'll fly from our memories if we're not careful. We have a "Funny Moments" jar that we keep each year and put all the little things said/done we want to remember in them and review them at the beginning of the next year so we can remember all the cute/fun moments that had happened throughout the year.
Happiness is one of those things that if we don't set out each day trying to achieve it, it'll slip right through our fingers. I know that these times are hard, but there is happiness in them. Lets focus on the good, and treasure those moments instead of wallowing in our own self pity or in all the bad times. This is one of those times I'm grateful for having a bad memory now, now I can forget things I don't want to remember (and sometimes things I do want to remember :/ ) and find greater joy in my life, my family and those who do want to be my friends and participate in my family's life as well. May we all find that happiness, good luck!
